Time...

It doesn’t work like this, dear ISB. At least not in the world I live in. Things don’t always go so fast. They just don’t. I don’t know about others, but that anxiety of entering your gates for the first time is still fresh somewhere within. And yet, we are half way through the course, the entire journey. How!?

Apologies for not having paid attention (not that you gave me any time for that), but are we seriously half way through? For heaven’s sake, I haven’t even seen the building properly. And no, glancing at it when running late for a lecture doesn’t count. I need more time, dear ISB. I really do.

I want a few days when I could just sit and watch. Watch the atrium, lie down undisturbed at the 08 lounge, rummage through the sheer variety of books in the LRC, take some pictures, no, take lots of pictures. I need time to sit and soak you in. I need time to observe. How many steps are there to the atrium? I don’t know. How do the bricks feel like? I don’t know! How many kinds of plants are there in my backyard? I don’t know.

But yes, I would want to know. I want to know things to remember you by. You are my first home away from home, dear ISB, and it breaks my heart to know that very soon, before I realize, I would have to leave you. Yes, I will be an alum, I will be always welcome, etc etc. But it’s not the same, and you know that.

Laughing, bawling, jumping, you showed me life I never knew existed. You showed me things I could do, but wasn’t aware of. You opened up a window, and showed me a world where anything is possible. Yes, anything. You taught me the difference between being idealistic and pragmatic. I thought I knew a lot, but you gave me humility that will last a lifetime.

There’s so much you have done, in such a short time. But then, won’t you give me just a little more time? Please?

Life, with a touch of LIME

Cause at ISB, we still scrape the bottom of our time barrel to participate in B-plan competitions.
And yes, the experience is so worth every ounce of effort spent.

No, we didn’t win this one, but still.

All the best Three Marketeers. Make us proud. :)

Until then, we relive our own quirky moments….

When we (tried to) flirt



When we posed effortlessly…




When we prayed with all our might…




And checked out the latest…




Threw in some drama that scared off quadies..




And took to the board…




And finally…, we put it all together!!

Bhag Bhag..!

When Managerial Accoutning, Corporate Finance, Operations and Entrepreneurship, ELP, Case Study competitions, college events and parties gang up, what do you do?

BHAG BHAG..!!!

PS: Only one more week to go before Term 3 ends.

At the rate at which things are going, I might still feel like a newbie in ISB on my graduation day!

SMS scandal

If you wish to tell someone about your life, just give him your phone. Cause your SMS inbox will probably reveal much more than you ever will. At least my phone does. Here’s what the inbox messages say, about life, at ISB:

“K. Cool. Going to 08?”

“Not coming to class. Pick up notes for me and tell ******* I am not well ;)”

 “I am assuming you are in the loo or something.”

“Dude your keys are in the go green bag hanging on the clothes hanger”

“Don’t worry…”

“Quiz hai ya nahi?”

“Awake?”

“Did he say masterbated?”

“In Goel”

“Guys the party is nice. Come over”

“Does she know you already have me”

“In my quad”

And then, there are more gems. What does your inbox say? About life at ISB?

True Story...

The most powerful way to inspire someone is to tell him a story... a real story...

Similar to what I heard... here... at ISB....

The woman: Shaheen Mistri, Founder and CEO, Teach For India

Who moved my class?

Prof *facing the whiteboard*

Blah blah… blah blah blah… bleh blah bleh… bleh bleh blah blah….

Blah blah bleh… bleh blah… blah blah…

*Turns around. Finds class empty*

Prof: Oh c’mon guys! It wasn’t THAT boring..!!

Moments... :)

New section, familiar faces, unfamiliar names. So what we do to break ice? We dance!

And ensure everybody joins in...

We pull our weight... and the team's

And don't even wait for work to begin...

Our one shot to happiness...

...does have its take-aways... :)

Yet another memorable week.... noted in the pages of ISB!

Shaking that biscuit

Section C at 8.30 PM:

Section C at 9 PM:

Section C at 9.30 PM:

 

And finally Section C at 10.30 PM!!

Some gyrating moves + many procrastinated assignments + random additions on stage = Shit loads of fun

(And yes, a runner up prize on the side, but who cares about that anyway!?)

Morning raga

8:45 AM: *phone rings*

You: Hmm?

Friend: Run Lola Run!

You: Huh?

Friend: Run Lola Run!

*You check time and jump out of bed. At a time when you are supposed to be in class, you were lying sprawled in your boxers. You pick up the first pair of clothes that you can reach, open the door and run*

8:46 AM: Leave quad

8:47 AM: Reach the backdoor of Goels. Yes, you run FAST. Take the Goel’s kitchen shortcut. *Seeing you run, staff promptly moves away from the corridor*

8:48 AM: In the lift *fuck! Which classroom!? You text your friend*

8:48:10 AM: Second floor. Empty. *Which one, which one! AC 6? Is it 6? Guess so. You run for 6*

8.48: 30 AM: Outside AC 6. You see a familiar face inside. Is he in my section!? Looks like! You enter.

*Half way through your chair, you see it’s occupied by somebody else. Everyone is staring at you as if you entered wearing a fur boa!!  What happened!? You entered the wrong fucking class! I knew nothing good will come out of this section change! I don’t even know who is in my section!*

8:50 AM: You quietly move out as people try and control their laughter.

8:51 AM: You enter the right class.

And as you settle down, and look at the time, you cannot imagine all that happened in six minutes FLAT!

Life IS fast at ISB! Zzzzz!

Beauty..?

If and when you come to ISB, amidst the utter chaos, try and notice the small things around. Cause if you are weird enough to appreciate randomness, there's lots for you...

So much that it reminds me of this dialogue from American Beauty...

"Video's a poor excuse, I know. But it helps me remember... and I need to remember... Sometimes there's so much beauty in the world I feel like I can't take it, like my heart's going to cave in."

Indeed, there's so much beauty... at ISB

Optimizing the end...

And finally, we had our last DMOP class. And before we walk into the exam hall to face our end-term paper, we thought why not bid adieu in style. So Supriya and Sumaira from class put together a video... And yes, it was indeed a memorable goodbye.. :)



Where's my sunscreen?

At ISB, when the going gets tough.....

just use Sunscreen...

Simple, ain't it?

And as you listen to Bazz Luhrmann's advice, remind yourself...  

“Don’t worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum.”

“Sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes you’re behind…the race is long, and in the end, it’s only with yourself.”

“Whatever you do, don’t congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself either – your choices are half chance, so are everybody else’s.”

 “Don’t expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund, maybe you have a wealthy spouse; but you never know when either one might run out.”

Tree-some

10 days ago: 

Decision tree? Hmm. But what's a decision tree?

Today morning: 

Decision tree? You mean this...?

Yea. We do learn things pretty fast here.

PS: It's a decision tree to help an investor decide which fashion label (out of two) to invest in, whether the label must be tested before launch or not. What will happen if it is launched without being tested? Will it be a guaranteed hit if launched after the test? Blah blah blah blah.

PPS: Click on picture to view the work of art. Impressive, ain't it?  :p

The KIMOTHI

Photo: Anand Ramaswami

It suddenly struck me. Out of absolute nowhere. This blog deserves more ‘people’ pictures. People who make ISB what it is, without whom the campus would have been tad dull. So ladies and gentlemen, presenting… Mr Abhinav Kimothi…!

* Sleeps with lights on

* Digs shayaris

* Is terribly emotional about ‘Old Monk’

* Theatre aficionado

* Gets others drunk when he himself is high

* Loves his Section E to bits

* Makes awesome tea for his quadmates

And more importantly, the most jovial quadie I could have asked for.

And even more importantly, it’s his birthday today. Happy birthday dude.

Dunking abhi baaki hai! :)

Plzzz sirrrrrrrr

Class: DMOP

Professor:

I wanted to show you all this game, but we don't have too much time left since you guys asked too many questions. So we will just move ahead.

Class:

Nooooooohhhhhhhh….. pleaseeeeeee sirrrrrrr…… 5 minutes sirrrrrrrrr….. gameeeeeeee…… quickly quickly we will doooooo….. sirrrrrrrrr……

Ahem. And the average age of class is 27, they say…

Are YOU happy?

At ISB....Happiness is…

…decent food at Goel’s…

…hopping onto a friend’s bike and riding out of campus to have the tapri-waali chai…. at 4 in the morning…

….a really REALLY kickass lecture… (and thankfully, there are quite a few of them)

…knowing your grades are somewhere close to the mean…

…not having to make your bed every morning…

…peacocks shutting the fuck up… occasionally…

...being able to take time out for the Rec Center!

…doing taandav nritya on the 08 lounge before a fucked-up weekend…

…lecture with no marks for CP!

…cribbing together…crying together… sulking together…

Happiness is…

…being happy about being at ISB!

:)

CHAPTER TWO!

All Mumbaiites share a love-hate relationship with the city. However, when you go visit for a day, and the city welcomes you with the first showers of the season, the love part goes a wee bit up.

With all the grim and sweat, the rains washed term 1 away. Can’t believe term 1 is history... already.

Term 2 starts tomorrow. And when I came back today, I found…

The campus was quiter…

And prettier…

My fridge had become more …well…interesting..  (Thanks to Kimothi)

The skies were blue-er

And the sink was fuller!! Guys clean up!

PS: Pre-reads for tomorrow. Some 60 pages of some coca-cola thing. There we go..!!

PPS: Also in store this evening. Some alums are gonna give gyaan on how to escape (or rather lessen) the Term 2 violence. Wondering what CAN they say. Acche se padhai karna? That even my mom said.

MY GPA!!!!!!!!!!!

What happened? No new posts?
No new pictures?
Chilled out there? Nothing much happening?

For everyone who's been asking such questions:

Bottom line:
End term exams are here. And the campus looks like a zombie land. More importantly, I have stopped looking at myself in the mirror. I look so screwed!!!

Losing it..!

It’s insane… how ISB is percolating down to everything we do, or say. In fact, it’s scary. We have stopped thinking and talking how we once did. It’s like a mass metamorphosis in process.

Examples:

In class:

Student one: Shit man. I don’t want to be in the Dean’s list, but D shee nahi chahiye.

Student two: Haan yaar. Or else Dhak Dhak D ho jayega. Dhak Dhak D!

Student one: Fail ho gaya to? F aaya to?

Student two: Phir to bas… aska lakadi gala gala gala..!!

On the cricket ground:

Person who came in last got a chance to bat first. Hence, the comment:

He is so LIFO man! Last in, first out!

In the atrium:

Overheard: No yaar. I don’t wanna stand in the sun. I will stand in the shade. That’s where I get maximum utility!

During a seminar:

Someone makes an absurd statement. Guy sitting next to me passes on a chit. It reads:

CP!

I am telling you. We are officially going nuts!

Academic who?

On the face of it, it's such a BHARI name. ACADEMIC ASSOCIATES!

Imagine introducing yourself outside ISB. .."Hi! I am the AA of the ISB PGPM."

Whatte impression sirji! Whatte impression!

Party-holics

The first mid-terms are done and dusted.

Stats was okay. Accounting didn't disappoint.

Economics wasn't as bad as expected.

But yes, marketing took the cake!

(and smashed it on our faces!)

The exams will be back by the end of the month. Untill then, we twist...!

Sorry, no change!

Some things don’t change…. whether you are three…. or thirty

Before every exam, we still stress ourselves thin

Everybody claims to have studied ‘nothing’

But keep books open till the last possible minute

Somewhere, we all know. It’s so second grade… this approach.

But we still indulge ourselves. For the sake of it.

Cause at ISB, some things don’t change…. whether you are three…. or thirty!

The BUZZ words

How would you react when your Economics professor puts on some music in class and makes a light-hearted mockery of his own subject… all in the name of gyaan? Prof Bubna did. Here’s how…

Disclaimer: Video is riddled with Economics jargons, but it’s a MUST WATCH!

So let's put on the mantra!!
MRRRR equals MCCCC
MRRRR equals MCCCC!!!!!!

Define: Cannibalization

Class: Marketing (We just don’t get enough of it, do we?)

Define: Cannibalization

Definition: Keeping the name cards too close can eat into each other’s Class Participation opportunity resulting in CP cannibalization!!

Take away: When sitting in the last row, keep name cards far apart. They must convey two SEPARATE entities and not one giant person trying to raise both his hands. This will result in optimum CP opportunities.

Bhaiyaji ISMYLEE!!!!!!

Apart  from the core courses, we have a lot of other stuff going on as well. There's the Leadership Development Programme, there's the Innovation Educators Conference (at least that's what I think it was called).... and then of course...

*drum rolls*

there's MODELLING!!!

 It ain't easy.. giving that perfect smile...

 and while others say boring stuff like.. cheese... we say... McKinseyyyyyyy!!!!! :P (Eh, Agni?)

 If only real-life board rooms could look this spunky!

And last but not the least... the BEST study group EVER!!!! :D

Learning curve

Let’s face it. ISB. PGP Programme. Pretty intensive (and expensive) course.

Correction. It’s a FREAKING expensive course. So it better teach us something we don’t know already. Now that we are a week into the core courses, what exactly have we learned?

An update:

Jhataak colour shirts are good for you…

…especially if you sit in the last row. It helps get professor’s attention and you have a higher probability of blessing the class with your arbit inputs. Long hands help, but since you can’t do much about them, try that outrageous shirt.

Sunk costs…

You like girl. You spend time. You spend money. Girl turns out to be a bitch.

Your time and money = sunk cost.

Fuck it. Chase another bitch…err… I mean… girl

Deadlines are magicians!

It’s like the Big Daddy of all. The moment we hear it approaching, groups settle their disputes, ideas pop out, reports jump out of nowhere. Seriously, it’s the classic Bollywood scene where brats turn into angels and say, ‘Papa aa gaye! Papa aa gaye!”

Love can also be in a hurry!

One week into the core courses and the dating game has already begun. Who says love takes time? Or is it love? Don’t know. Don’t care.

Peacocks are annoying

Peacocks are no longer silent birds that walk around looking pretty. They scream. And they don’t care if you were up till 4 in the morning working on a case study. They still choose to exercise their vocal cords from 6 AM onwards.

Tension kayko lene ka!??

Today: Saturday

Monday: 8 AM               --> Group assignment submission (Managerial Economics)

Monday: 11.15 AM        --> Class quiz (Statistics)

Monday: 8.00 AM          --> Individual assignment submission (Financial Accounting)

Monday: Noon                --> Individual assignment submission (Statistics)

Tuesday: 10.45 AM        --> Presentation of Kodak Case-Study

Wednesday: 8 AM          --> Submission of final Kodak Case Study

Oh shit.. almost forgot.

Pre-reads for monday --> Accounting chapter 7 and the Heineiken Financial reports.

And there's something to read in statistics as well. Isn't  it? Or is it? No no. Wait a minute. I will ask my study mate.

Err. Maybe later. He seems a bit busy.

Starry starry nights

Thursday nights are different here.

Calculus unassumingly goes for a walk. Deviations cease to exist.

We hug strangers. And soon, turn into friends.

We drink to wafer-thin margins. And dance out of our limits.

These are starry starry nights.

The morning might fuck us yet again, we know.

But for the night, we couldn’t care less.

Time: 3.30 AM

Time: 5 AM

Sorry, what's the point?

Professor: Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown and Jill came tumbling after. Can anyone explain what Jack and Jill were doing up there?

Student 1: Jack and Jill ought to have a vision. Yes, they did go up the hill to fetch a pail of water. But what shouldn’t be forgotten is that at the end, Jack fell down and broke his crown and Jill came tumbling marginally after.

Student 2: From a strategic perspective, Jack and Jill decided to go up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Though Jack fell down and broke his crown, I strongly believe Jill also came tumbling after.

Student 3: I guess Jack and Jill ought to have utilized the pail of water in a more targeted fashion. But as we know, Jack fell down and broke his crown and Jill came tumbling after.

This, my friend, is what we call Class Participation. It warms my heart to see how the chase of marks can create such beautiful shit in such an intelligent class. I swear! It’s the most pretty-looking shit I have ever seen!!

Given the in-depth case studies, the marketing lecture could have been the ‘best’, but it chose to be ‘good’. Who lost?  

On our first day at ISB, Dean Ajit asked us to concentrate on ‘learning’ over 'marks'. Sorry Dean Ajit, we tried. Maybe next term?

Horn NO CP pls!

So what do you do when the professor starts speaking Mars and you don’t give a fuck about Class Participation?

Simple.

And there it begins...

Suddenly, there’s an eerie silence in the campus. It’s quiet. Very quiet. You needn’t even refer to the schedule to know what’s up. The silence says it all.

Yes, the core terms are here.

All the best guys. Let’s do it!

PS:  

Pre-reads for tomorrow.

Business statistics: 7 chapters.

Financial accounting: 2 chapters + Procter and Gamble Case study.

Current status: *cant reveal due to group’s non-disclosure policy. That’s how we save face*

Arrz kiya hai...

At ISB, the most interesting nuggets of gyaan are thrown at you when you least expect them. For instance, during the accounting pre-terms, after big-time gyaan on debits, credits, liabilities, assets, equity, inventory, blah blah came the mother statement of all…

Profit equals cash received, plus the accrued cash.

Accrued is intangible. Hence, profit is intangible.

Whatever is intangible is only a concept.

Hence, profit is a concept.

But businesses don’t run on concepts. They run on reality.

And cash is reality.

Businesses run on cash, not profits!

I swear on God I wanted to stand on the table and clap for her. I swear!! In fact, I almost blurted out “Waah waah! Waah waah!”

I love it when business and philosophy start dating in the classroom! Such fun!

Look Ma... My new home..!

Every time you call... there's one question you always ask...

So, is it nice out there?

Well... it's nice for sure... though 'nice' no longer means what it once meant.

The new home gives me my own space...

...and yet holds some memories of the old one...

The village seems to have a life of its own... Seasons binded in a single day... 

The palace holds me in awe every time I see it...

The courtyard is like a Bengali's adda... forever abuzz with conversations...
Sometimes, it's quiet as well... which is when I love it even more...

Here walls mirror your attitude...

And knowledge walks down the stairs...

The new home has a large terrace...

That overlooks my village...

It's fit for a moment of peace... when I wish to reflect on life... and think about you...

But even fitter for a midnight drinking session... ;)

Here, there are long-winded ways.. it takes effort to not get lost...

But even when you do... you always meet someone who you can have a conversation with...

So well... yes.. the new home is nice... for sure..
Though 'nice' no longer means what it once meant..! 

The fairy and her broom

Finally met the angelic lady who turns into our fairy Godmother every afternoon. She comes tiptoeing into our quads, knocks on our door and does a mini singing jig “Howsskipping!”

I swear, she actually sings!!

Which set me thinking, imagine just how much this fairy Godmother might be knowing about us (considering she tidies up our Tsunami-stricken rooms every single day). She knows our hygiene habits, how orderly (or disorderly) we are. The books we own, the laptops we carry, the shoes lying in some corner, pictures of loved ones on our desks, everything! Yes, it’s possible she is least interested, but imagine if she’s the observant kind.

It was almost disconcerting to come face to face with someone who might know so much about me and I know zilch about her.

PS: Wanted to thank her, but she seemed quite shy. So didn’t bother :P

The training begins

The moment you enter ISB, your training begins. It's tough. It's intense. Far more difficult than you can ever imagine. So ladies and gentlemen, here's a glimpse of the rigorous process that churns out the top CEOs of future India.

Note to all future applicants:
I know it doesn't look easy. But guess what. In reality, it's tougher. So think twice before applying. You might not know what you are signing up for.

Leadership comes at a price after all.